Is My Red Your Green?

Fascinating.

On the Birth Certificate

I'm a heavy Photoshop and Illustrator user, and I've been saying the same thing since last spring about the president's alleged birth certificate.

It was obviously built in Illustrator based on the the layering of the pdf.  Then there's also the matter - which this video doesn't even address - of the continuation of the security pattern past where an effect has been applied to make it appear as if a page from a book has been scanned.  It was obviously intended to be cropped, but wasn't.

There are a lot of things wrong with this document.  The findings of the Arizona law enforcement team further confirmed my suspicion that something is rotten here.  I'm not saying that there isn't a genuine birth certificate somewhere, but I find it interesting that it was put out as a layered PDF, not as a standard JPEG and that the actual paper copy has never been produced.

And if there has been some work done to the document to clean up an old document to make it more readable - which is completely understandable given the nature of the document -  why would the entire document be recreated in such a way?  What would be the point?  And then, where is the "before" to this "after" document?

Sh*t Designers Say

I know I'm about an hour and a half late to the "Shit ___ Say" meme party, but as a designer, I just had to share this.  Every word is true.

Obama Asks Designers to Work for Free

From Rolling Stone:

The Obama campaign has more than $60 million cash on hand. In an economy this bad, you'd think a presidential campaign that flush would be happy to pay good money for a talented designer to create a campaign poster.  

But the folks at Obama campaign have taken a page from the Arianna Huffington book of economic exploitation and called on "artists across the country" to create a poster ... for free.
And here's the kicker. It's a jobs poster.

Yes, the Obama campaign is soliciting unpaid labor to create a poster "illustrating why we support President Obama's plan to create jobs now, and why we'll re-elect him to continue fighting for jobs for the next four years."

If you win? You get: A framed copy of your own poster, signed by the president ("approximate retail value $195").

And if you don't win? Well, that's too bad. You've not only lost the contest, you've also surrendered your intellectual property. "All submissions will become the property of Obama for America," according to the fine print.

You stay classy, Obama.


Surely, no self-respecting AIGA member would dare get anywhere near this, right?

So, You Think You're a Designer?

Prove it.

Play this kerning game that asks you to correctly kern 10 words and compares your solutions to those of professional designers.

I scored a 96 out of 100 my first time out.

Everyone Needs a Drummer

From Seth Godin:

Keith Richards tells a great story about Charlie Watts, legendary drummer for the Stones.

After a night of drinking, Mick saw Charlie asleep and yelled, "Is that my drummer? Why don't you get your arse down here?"

Richards continues, "Charlie got dressed in a Savile Row suit, tie, shoes, shaved, came down, grabbed him and went boom! Don't ever call me "your drummer" again. You're my ... singer."

No drums, no Stones.

Who's playing the drums in your shop?

Awesome.

... And back to the bad

I wish bad design wasn't so easy to find. This is just one sign at our local dump. Every sign there has stretched type like this.

The good stands out

I post examples of bad design all the time. Here's an example of some really nice looking design by a company called Fastlane.

What is this again?

Dear Sam Houston State,

You never ever, EVER put the word "brochure" on the front of your brochure. #designfail

The Way I Shot It

I love it when I see people using photos I shot in a way that I had in mind when I shot them. This image is part of this shoot of Keith Warren for his new show, "Ranch Properties TV."

10 Questions

There's a great post over at The Design Cubicle about 20 questions to ask your client before starting their logo. It's so good, I'm probably going to start asking every single one of those questions every time.

But then there's this from Why Advertising Sucks - 10 questions that you REALLY want to ask:

1) When I give you the quote for the logo, will you take days or hours to tell me how expensive it is without thinking of how much hours will it take, how much expertise it is needed to do a great logo... or just because you don't respect designer prices?

2) Can you be able to choose wisely or will you show it to your 80 year old granpa, your wife and your 3 month old kid?

3) Can you be able to visualize the logo with slight changes and approve a line of design or are you so limited that you will kill it, just because?

4) Will you have a revision fest with it?

5) Do you promise not to mix and match different versions and make me do a crap design?

6) Can I stop you from letting me know what logos you would like it to be similar to?

7) Will you understand that the logo you did on Microsoft Office is NOT a good starting point for me to design?

8) Do you understand that if you make hundreds of revisions, I will charge you for them?

9) Have someone ever told you that if an artist gives you a jpg of your logo as a final arwork... you really don't have it? You just have a crap jpg?

10) If by some reason you choose another artist to do your design... can you make sure he or she does in in vectors? I really can't stand people who design logos on photoshop and I refuse to redo yours someday down the line.

I think we designers can appreciate exactly how right most of these are.

The Texsun Post

There's a brand of juice that they serve in the break room here at work called Texsun. With a name like Texsun, you' think it would be based in Texas and feature Texas orange juice.

And you'd be wrong.

Texsun juice is actually from Florida. How do I know this? Because it says so right on the side. See? "Distributed by Citrus World, Inc."



But I doubt even the Florida connection (and in fact I actually suspect that we may be buying some fell-off-the-back-of-a-truck black market Chinese OJ because of the next sentence:
"A COOPERATIVE OR CROWERS BASED IN LAKE WALES, FLORIDA, 33853, USA"



So who's based in Lake Wales - a cooperative or a crower? And what the heck is a crower doing making orange juice? Shouldn't they be, you know, crowing instead?

How did no one catch not one, but TWO typos on the can?


[EDIT:] After I posted, I happened to turn the can over to see if it was expired. This is what I found:



Texsun, it turns out, is neither a product of Texas nor Florida. It's made in Mexico. So much for truth in packaging.

Pick Two

One of my favorite sayings for more than ten years has been: "You can have it fast, cheap or good. Pick two."

This graphic is masterfully done.

Starbucks Gets a New Logo

One word: yuck.

Comedy Central Proves Just How Un-Funny They've Become

Comedy Central: This Is 2011

www.comedycentral.com

Funny Jokes It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia Ugly Americans

I don't hate it. I just don't think it says "fun" or "funny."

The Evolution of Chewbacca

From BinaryBonsai:




Fascinating article. I love this, especially:

Kiel Bryant: I’m dismayed by the cult of originality — it sets up impossible, false expectations which fail to grasp what art is. Innovation is good, exploration is to be encouraged — they build on what’s gone before — but more often than not it’s enjoyable to simply experience an idea well-conceived, regardless of that idea’s source or its “originality.” And in the final analysis, were Star Wars or [Raiders of the Lost Ark] ever intended to be wildly original? No, they’re pastiche — valentines to the swashbuckling genres of yore. Kids, especially millennials, make a simple and honest mistake borne out of youth: they see Star Wars before they’ve seen its inspirations and assume it came that way fully assembled, direct from Lucas’ head. They witness result, not process. Then, growing as artists or cinephiles, their awareness gradually enlarges, the supporting armature begins to show — and because the film wasn’t what they’d originally dreamt (a total creation, which is an impossibility), they decide George Lucas isn’t worth the praise they originally foisted on him. Absolutely circular, and absolutely pointless.

It is far easier to destroy than to create.

The Democrats' New Clothes

From Democrat.org:

Before a standing-room-only crowd at George Washington University's Jack Morton Auditorium today, DNC Chairman Tim Kaine unveiled a new look—and a new website—for the Democratic Party.

I'm not going to comment on the design here as there's already been some pretty good analysis of it already.

All I'm going to say is that I gotta a think that the people at the Hotel Derek are pretty pissed right about now.



I love these comments from the Brand New design blog:

Reminds me of a standardized test form…I really want to fill in the circle completely with my #2 pencil.

And my answer would be “D. None of the above”

and

Quite Possibly the Worst Logo Ever

This is the logo for the Sam Houston State University (my alma mater) College of Humanities and Social Sciences.



I'm not even sure where to begin with how awful this "logo" is. I can almost hear the committee meeting that spawned this monstrosity.

Ugh.

Subtlety

Genius post from Seth Godin:

Subtle is a cousin of beautiful.

Subtle design and messaging challenge the user to make her own connections instead of spelling out every detail. Connections we make are more powerful than connections made for us. If Amazon and Zappos had been called "reallybigbookstore.com" and "tonsofshoes.com" it might have made some early investors happy, but they would have built little of value.

Subtle details demonstrate power. Instead of being in an urgent hurry to yell about every feature or benefit, you demonstrate confidence by taking your time and allowing people to explore. They don't put huge banners on the Hermes store, announcing how good the silk is and how many famous people shop there...

And subtle messaging communicates insider status. I don't have to say, "Hey I was in Skull and
Bones too! You should hire me!" Instead, a subtle (secret) handshake does all the talking that's needed.

It's tempting to turn the dial all the way to 11, the make everything just a bit louder. The opposite is precisely what you might need.

I'm aware of the oxymoronic nature of spelling out details about subtlety. At least I didn't explicitly point out the Spinal Tap reference.

Designers Have a Sick Sense of Humor

Shannon (the secretary) has lost her cat and has asked David (the graphic designer) to help with a lost poster. This is their email correspondence...


Hi
I opened the screen door yesterday and my cat got out and has been missing since then so I was wondering if you are not to busy you could make a poster for me. It has to be A4 and I will photocopy it and put it around my suburb this afternoon.



This is the only photo of her I have she answers to the name Missy and is black and white and about 8 months old. missing on Harper street and my phone number.
Thanks Shan.

____________________________________________________
From:David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.26am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Poster
Dear Shannon,
That is shocking news. Luckily I was sitting down when I read your email and not half way up a ladder or tree. How are you holding up? I am surprised you managed to attend work at all what with thinking about Missy out there cold, frightened and alone... possibly lying on the side of the road, her back legs squashed by a vehicle, calling out "Shannon, where are you?"
Although I have two clients expecting completed work this afternoon, I will, of course, drop everything and do whatever it takes to facilitate the speedy return of Missy.
Regards, David.

____________________________________________________
From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.37am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Poster

yeah ok thanks. I know you dont like cats but I am really worried about mine. I have to leave at 1pm today.

____________________________________________________
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.17am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
I never said I don't like cats. Once, having been invited to a party, I went clothes shopping beforehand and bought a pair of expensive G-Star boots. They were two sizes too small but I wanted them so badly I figured I could just wear them without socks and cut my toenails very short. As the party was only a few blocks from my place, I decided to walk. After the first block, I lost all feeling in my feet. Arriving at the party, I stumbled into a guy named Steven, spilling Malibu & coke onto his white Wham 'Choose Life' t-shirt, and he punched me. An hour or so after the incident, Steven sat down in a chair already occupied by a cat. The surprised cat clawed and snarled causing Steven to leap out of the chair, slip on a rug and strike his forehead onto the corner of a speaker; resulting in a two inch open gash. In its shock, the cat also defecated, leaving Steven with a foul stain down the back of his beige cargo pants. I liked that cat.
Attached poster as requested.
Regards, David.

____________________________________________________
From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.24am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

yeah thats not what I was looking for at all. it looks like a movie and how come the photo of Missy is so small?

____________________________________________________
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.28am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
It's a design thing. The cat is lost in the negative space.
Regards, David.

____________________________________________________
From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.33am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Thats just stupid. Can you do it properly please? I am extremely emotional over this and was up all night in tears. you seem to think it is funny. Can you make the photo bigger please and fix the text and do it in colour please. Thanks.

____________________________________________________
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.46am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
Having worked with designers for a few years now, I would have assumed you understood, despite our vague suggestions otherwise, we do not welcome constructive criticism. I don't come downstairs and tell you how to send text messages, log onto Facebook and look out of the window. I am willing to overlook this faux pas due to you no doubt being preoccupied with thoughts of Missy attempting to make her way home across busy intersections or being trapped in a drain as it slowly fills with water. I spent three days down a well once but that was just for fun.
I have amended and attached the poster as per your instructions.
Regards, David.

____________________________________________________
From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.59am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

This is worse than the other one. can you make it so it shows the whole photo of Missy and delete the stupid text that says missing missy off it? I just want it to say Lost.

____________________________________________________
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.14am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

____________________________________________________
From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.21am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

yeah can you do the poster or not? I just want a photo and the word lost and the telephone number and when and where she was lost and her name. Not like a movie poster or anything stupid. I have to leave early today. If it was your cat I would help you. Thanks.

____________________________________________________
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.32am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Awww

Dear Shannon,
I don't have a cat. I once agreed to look after a friend's cat for a week but after he dropped it off at my apartment and explained the concept of kitty litter, I kept the cat in a closed cardboard box in the shed and forgot about it. If I wanted to feed something and clean faeces, I wouldn't have put my mother in that home after her stroke. A week later, when my friend came to collect his cat, I pretended that I was not home and mailed the box to him. Apparently I failed to put enough stamps on the package and he had to collect it from the post office and pay eighteen dollars. He still goes on about that sometimes, people need to learn to let go.
I have attached the amended version of your poster as per your detailed instructions.
Regards, David.

____________________________________________________
From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.47am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Awww

Thats not my cat. where did you get that picture from? That cat is orange. I gave you a photo of my cat.

____________________________________________________
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.58am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Awww

I know, but that one is cute. As Missy has quite possibly met any one of several violent ends, it is possible you might get a better cat out of this. If anybody calls and says "I haven't seen your orange cat but I did find a black and white one with its hind legs run over by a car, do you want it?" you can politely decline and save yourself a costly veterinarian bill.
I knew someone who had a basset hound that had its hind legs removed after an accident and it had to walk around with one of those little buggies with wheels. If it had been my dog I would have asked for all its legs to be removed and replaced with wheels and had a remote control installed. I could charge neighbourhood kids for rides and enter it in races. If I did the same with a horse I could drive it to work. I would call it Steven.
Regards, David.

____________________________________________________
From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.07pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Please just use the photo I gave you.

____________________________________________________

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.22pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

____________________________________________________
From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.34pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

I didnt say there was a reward. I dont have $2000 dollars. What did you even put that there for? Apart from that it is perfect can you please remove the reward bit. Thanks Shan.

____________________________________________________

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.42pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

____________________________________________________
From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.51pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Can you just please take the reward bit off altogether? I have to leave in ten minutes and I still have to make photocopies of it.

____________________________________________________
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.56pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

____________________________________________________
From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 1.03pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Fine. That will have to do.

Huge thanks to Flinta for passing this on...