Leaked iPhone 5 Official Video

Charlie Sheen Found Dead

From Reuters:

Charlie Sheen, the actor who in the past two weeks has appeared on television, radio and in magazines on an often confusing and colorfully-worded tirade against his former employer, Chuck Lorre, was found dead last night in his Malibu home. The cause was no immediately clear, but sources close the investigation said that drug paraphernalia, meth-amphetamines and piles of cocaine were littered throughout the house.

Now, I just made that up. But if it were real, would you really be surprised? Even if Sheen isn't on drugs, he's clearly mentally unstable and needs help - and quick - before he disappears down the rabbit hole forever. It may be entertaining to see what Sheen will say and do next, but it's also frightening. I hope he has family and friends around him that have his best interests at heart.

And in Other Drug-Related News...

From ABC News:

DEA: U.S.-Mexico Cross Border Drug Tunnel Bust Yields 30 Tons of Marijuana

The Drug Enforcement Administration says it has busted a significant cross-border, drug-smuggling tunnel and netted about 30 tons of marijuana seized at two warehouses in the United States and Mexico.

The 1,800-foot underground tunnel linked a warehouse in Otey Mesa, Calif., with a similar sized building in Tijuana, Mexico. Agents and officers with the Tunnel Task Force, including the DEA, Immigration and Customs Enforcement, Customs and Border Protection and the California Bureau of Narcotics Enforcement, had been conducting surveillance in the area when the officers noticed suspiciousactivity around a tractor-trailer truck being loaded and parked at the warehouse in Otey Mesa.

After the truck departed the warehouse, a police check-point was established so the truck could be searched. Border Patrol agents and officers discovered 10 tons of marijuana stuffed into large cargo boxes, according to law enforcement officials.

Singer Willie Nelson was reportedly pissed.

Okay. I added that last line.

[NSFW] Supreme Court Confirms: Death Penalty is "Badass"

Huge badass thanks go out to Matt for passing this along.

Obama Lays Out Demands for Regulating Government Power

President Obama is traveling to the shadow of the Washington Memorial on Thursday to counter what he calls "the furious efforts of industry lobbyists" trying to weaken or kill new governmental regulations that he says are needed to stave off a second Revolutionary War.

As the Senate debates how to rewrite rules governing the Congress and the President, Mr. Obama will lay out the elements he insists must be in any legislation to get his signature. Among them are more taxpayer protections, limits on the size of government and the amount of taxes and other fees it may impose, reforms on Congressional compensation and greater transparency for controversial governmental procedures known as earmarks.

Sound too good to be true? It is. This is how the original story from the NYTimes read:

Obama Lays Out Demands for Regulating Financial Industry

President Obama is traveling to the shadow of Wall Street on Thursday to counter what he calls "the furious efforts of industry lobbyists" trying to weaken or kill new financial regulations that he says are needed to stave off a second Great Depression.

As the Senate debates how to rewrite rules governing the financial industry, Mr. Obama will lay out the elements he insists must be in any legislation to get his signature. Among them are more consumer protections, limits on the size of banks and the risks they can take, reforms on executive compensation and greater transparency for controversial securities known as derivatives.

Perhaps Obama and the Congress should consider the former before they attempt the latter.

Unicorn... It's What's For Dinner!

From Think Geek:

Radiant Farms Canned Unicorn Meat Specifications:

- Limited availability
- 14 ounces of delicious unicorn meat, canned for your convenience
- Imported from a small independent cannery in County Meath, Ireland
- Crunchy horn bits in every bite - an excellent source of Calcium
- Tastes like rotisserie chicken but with a hint of marshmallow sweetness
- Easily spreadable for sandwiches, hors d'oeuvres, and more
- Sparkly meat lends the unmistakable air of class and sophistication to your parties
- Unlike other meats, unicorn fat is polyunsaturated and lowers your LDL cholesterol
- Not yet approved by the USDA or FDA, but the nuns have eaten it for centuries and they're healthy as horses

There's a recipe there for Savory Unicorn & Heirloom Tomato Bruchetta Recipe that sounds amazing! Check it out!!!

Balloonists Outraged Over 'Unrealistic' Portrayal of Balloon Travel

A number of active and veteran baloonists are protesting the Academy-Award "Best Picture" nominated, Up, saying the film is Hollywood hokum, portraying balloon vendors as renegades while failing to represent details about balloon travel accurately.

The criticism highlights the delicate relationship between "Up" and the Balloon Federation of Amedrica (BFA) . BFA President Don Edwards says the film is "authentic" and "very compelling" and has recommended it to his staff. But the federation says it pulled its "Up" production assistance at the last minute in 2007, saying that the film's makers were shooting scenes that weren't in the screenplay submitted to the BFA, including a sequence that the government believed portrayed balloonists unflatteringly. The film's producers dispute elements of the account.

People have been particularly polarized on the issue, objecting to comments by some that Up was gritty, realistic and the best balloon movie ever.

"I think that's disrespectful to the men and women who are in balloons RIGHT NOW. It was Dumb. Dumb!" commented one opinionated moviegoer.

Others were not as put off. "Frankly, I don't care if it's accurate or not. It's gritty, suspense-filled and has a captivating story. If some of the details aren't quite right or if some of the details - or characters - are exaggerated from how things are in real life, so be it. I didn't expect the film to be a documentary when I went to see it. What I went to see was a captivating story set in the sky.

And that's what I got," said Destructo, mayor-for-life of Destructoville.

Astronauts Outraged Over 'Unrealistic' Portrayal of Space Travel

A number of active astronauts and veteran astronauts are protesting last summer's blockbuster film, Star Trek, saying the film is Hollywood hokum, portraying space travelers as renegades while failing to represent details about space travel accurately.

The criticism highlights the delicate relationship between "Star Trek" and the nation's space program. NASA Administrator Charles F. Bolden says the film is "authentic" and "very compelling" and has recommended it to his staff. But the government says it pulled its "Star Trek" production assistance at the last minute in 2007, saying that the film's makers were shooting scenes that weren't in the screenplay submitted to NASA, including a sequence that the government believed portrayed astronauts wearing red uniforms unflatteringly. The film's producers dispute elements of the account.

People have been particularly polarized on the issue, objecting to comments by some that Star Trek was gritty, realistic and the best space movie ever.

"I think that's disrespectful to the men and women who are in space RIGHT NOW. It was Dumb. Dumb!" commented one opinionated moviegoer.

Others were not as put off. "Frankly, I don't care if it's accurate or not. It's gritty, suspense-filled and has a captivating story. If some of the details aren't quite right or if some of the details - or characters - are exaggerated from how things are in real life, so be it. I didn't expect the film to be a documentary when I went to see it. What I went to see was a captivating story set in space.

And that's what I got," said Destructo, mayor-for-life of Destructoville.

'The Office' Ends As Documentary Crew Gets All The Footage It Needs

Also from the Onion:

SCRANTON, PA—After nearly six years on the air, NBC's hit show The Office ended abruptly Thursday when documentary filmmaker Ian Sheffield announced that he and his crew had all the footage of the Dunder Mifflin Paper Company's Scranton branch required for their project. "In retrospect, we really over-shot this thing by an enormous margin," said Sheffield, adding that he likely had more than enough good material after filming a British workplace from 2001 to 2003. "We would have finished much earlier if one employee or another didn't insist on being interviewed every three minutes. And I have no idea why we were invited to Jim and Pam's wedding. All of that stuff is totally unusable." Sheffield said that the footage will be drastically cut down and used primarily as B-roll for the planned 90-minute educational film about paper manufacture and production.