1989? Seriously????

Who thought this would be a good idea?

File this under "they've got a lot of damn nerve"

The Best Star Wars Phantom Menace Review EVER.

This is 70 minutes long, but completely worth it. It's hilarious, it's insightful, and it's not safe for work. Just like Destructoville.

Thought for the Day

If we can't even change the weather, how in the world are we supposed to believe that we can affect the climate?

Quote of the Day

When the people fear their government there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty.

-Thomas Jefferson

What I Want for Christmas

Tiger Woods' Wife, Kids Leaving Him for the Holidays

From Us Magazine:

Philandering golfer Tiger Woods likely won't be spending the holidays with his wife and two children.

Moving crews were spotted Tuesday at the family mansion in Windermere, Fla. Several workers were seen carting such items, including carefully wrapped artwork.

A source tells New York's Daily News that "Elin is planning to take the kids to spend the holidays with her family in Sweden."

Hello? Is this really a smart move? I think we've already established that he can't be trusted when left to his own devices.

Also, who takes the paintings when they go on vacation?

European Union Drops Long-Running Antitrust Case Against Microsoft

From the NYTimes:

European regulators dropped their antitrust case against Microsoft on Wednesday after the company agreed to offer customers a choice of rival Web browsers. The settlement ends what could have been a second costly legal battle for the American software giant.

Good for Microsoft. It's about time something fell their way. Good things happen when you don't try to bully your customers.

"Hunting"

I've been listening to a lot of guys here in town lately talk about deer hunting and what they do when they go. I've never been hunting, but I would love to go someday - but not the way a lot of these guys do it.

You see, what they do is putout a feeder that spits out food every day at a certain time. The deer come and eat the food and hang around the feeder. Then when hunting season opens, these guys go out and sit in a deer stand right next to the feeder and wait for the deer to come along to eat. Then BAM! they shoot the deer dead and pump up their chests like big mighty hunters. Then they bring the deer back and make chili and sausage with the meat that they "hunted."

Now again - I've never been deer hunting - but it just doesn't seem sporting to basically shoot a pet. I mean, if you're going to go hunting, then walk around with a gun looking for a deer to shoot. Sneak up on him and then shoot him. Now that's hunting. There's sport in that. But feeding deer into complacency just so you can blow them away when they come to eat at the trough? Come on. How do you live with yourself?

Democrats Give the Finger to the Country

From Philly.com:

The Democratic-controlled Senate yesterday cleared away a Republican filibuster of a huge end-of-year spending bill that rewards most federal agencies with generous budget boosts.

So let me get this straight... we're in the middle of a recession where people are losing their jobs in the tens of thousands every month, people are protesting in the streets because of government over-spending, the president is telling all of us in his speeches that we must learn to do more with less and the economy has been bad enough in the past year to where we had to spend trillions of dollars to stop the bleeding for fear of a complete collapse of our entire economic system?

And yet the Democrats can't stop spending money and are, in fact, giving "generous budget boosts" to federal agencies???

Eff you too, Democrats.

Citigroup Reaches Deal to Repay Bailout Billions

From the NYTimes:

Citigroup said Monday that it would repay $20 billion in
bailout money that it received from the Treasury Department,
after trying to persuade regulators that it was sound enough
to stand on its own.

Enough already, of this government nanny state! If they have the money to pay back the loan, let them! If they screw up and turn around and go out of business because they run their company stupidly, then let them! That's what happens in a free market economy. Trust me - the world will not end. Another company always slides in to take the place of the fallen.

Gatorade: A Case Study on How to Confuse Your Customers

From AdAge:

Gatorade is looking to innovate itself out of a sales slump and will spend some $30 million on product and packaging development to do so. The granddaddy of the sports-drink category is pushing forward with plans to introduce "G Series," a grouping of three product categories, while giving another facelift to its core product lines.

As part of the new product introduction, the core Thirst Quencher and G2 lines will also receive another facelift, the second in just over a year. Mr. d'Amore said the new packaging would be "more functional." The redesigned graphics will more prominently feature a low-calorie message for the G2 brand, which will have its calories reduced to 20 per 8-ounce serving, from 25. A spokesman declined to comment on the redesign of the Thirst Quencher products beyond saying that the brand is committed to G, the logo it introduced last year.

Then why change it? Gatorade, as well as its parent company Pepsi, just seems to be floundering around trying any stunt or change that will bring it sales in the short term. Pepsi reminds me of the comic book market in the '90s, when everything suddenly became about foil embossed holographic #0 die-cut covers. Everything was really, really flashy. Image comics was the worst about it. Oh, it sold boatloads of comics at first - until the novelty wore off. Pretty soon things settled back down to regular covers with story-driven issues inside. People were lured by the flash for awhile, but what people want is good, quality storylines and characters to read with their expendible money. And the same can be said of soft drinks. People are more concerned with dependable, consistent quality over the long run than a flash in the pan.

Just focus on the quality of the product, Pepsi, not gimmicks. And please develop a long-term strategy for your products that is built on the actual product rather than fads and marketing slight of hand. You're only confusing, well, everyone. And that leads to lower sales. People like the tried and true, especially in brand names they know and grew up with.

Gatorade has said this year's marketing efforts are on track, but sales and market share both fell in the first half, when the "What Is G?" marketing campaign was most prominent in the marketplace. In the first half of this year, volume dropped 18%, according to Beverage Digest, while market share dipped four points to 75%. Year-to-date volume is down 14% for the brand.

The reason both sales and market share have both fallen is because Gatorade is competing too heavily with itself and watering down the market. Al Ries said it best: "Then there’s Gatorade Tiger, with three flavors. Gatorade A.M. with two flavors. Gatorade Endurance Formula with three flavors. Gatorade Energy Bar with two flavors. Gatorade Nutrition Shake with three flavors. Gatorade Thirst Quencher with seven flavors. And Gatorade G2 with three flavors. Total: 23 flavors or varieties of Gatorade.

23 flavors? That's ridiculous. I'm assuming that includes the Gatorade Rain line. Or have they discontinued that? See what I mean? You can't just say "go get some Gatorade" anymore. It almost takes a college degree to figure out which Gatorade you want. Let me help them out: When I buy Gatorade for cycling, I still buy original Gatorade in either lemon/lime, orange or fruit punch flavors (just for variety). When I was mascotting, it was the same thing. I prefer the taste of Gatorade over Powerade, but I still stuck to those basic three flavors in the original formula. I tried the rain and the dew and the Tiger, but they didn't have the same effect that straight-up Gatorade did. And let me assure you that if there are any athletes out there who know about and value good hydration - it's mascots.

That's it. It's just that simple. Less is more. Wake up, Pepsi, and focus on why people drink your products and less on what will drive sales in the next quarter. Sales are going to slump, especially in a recession. But if you build a brand that people can depend on, the sales will be there for the long haul. Ask Coca-Cola.