Monday, July 12, 2010

I'd Be Thrilled, Personally



Thanks to Matt.

Blockheaded Blockbuster

From Yahoo News:

Blockbuster was the national leader in the video rental business for nearly two decades. Now it is contemplating Chapter 11 to eliminate debt. The company lost $65 million last quarter. Its revenue continues to fall rapidly as firms such as Redbox and NetFlix (Nasdaq: NFLX - News) siphon off its revenue. Blockbuster has more than 6,000 stores, so it is hard to imagine that the company could disappear. But, there is some precedent, even if it is on a smaller scale. Blockbuster rival Movie Gallery said in February that it would close all of its 2,400 U.S. stores. Blockbuster's model of renting movies through physical locations has been destroyed by cable and satellite video on demand, DVDs via mail and dispensing machines. Blockbuster may still be around as a company that has movie kiosks and a small mail and Internet-delivered content business. But its brick and-mortar business is dead.


Wrong. Cable and satellite didn't kill Blockbuster. And for that matter, neither did Netflix or Redbox. Blockbuster killed Blockbuster. Blockbuster grew to prominence with cable as a competitor, and satellite offers little real choice. "727 channels, and nothing's on... " Since way before Netflix or Redbox, Blockbuster's overpriced rental structure and its abusive (and confusing) late policies are what killed Blockbuster. Had they simply lowered their prices across the board - not with a half-hearted "some things are a dollar and some things aren't" model they tried a couple of years ago - and simply did away with late fees, they would still be the industry leader. Redbox's success is a direct result of people actively boycotting Blockbuster's prices.

I don't buy the notion that people are done with brick-and-mortars, either. After all, people still have to physically get in the car and drive to the nearest Redbox. But people are willing to do it because the price is right. With Blockbuster's overwhelming selection advantage, imagine what kind of business they would be doing if they would simply adopt Redbox's pricing model.

Competing on price isn't easy. But if you're going to compete on something other than price, you'd better have something that people will pay extra for. An in-stock guarantee, for instance. Or a by-mail order system. Or a digital delivery system. Or rent one-get one free. Or something.

But no. Blockbuster said "we're Blockbuster. This is the way we do things. This is the way we price our movies. Take it or leave it."

And people have been leaving it in droves. RIP, Blockbuster. I won't miss feeling beaten up every time I walked out of one of your stores.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Tax the Tan 'til There Ain't No Tan No More

From the Washington Post:

One of the less-publicized measures in the new health-care law, the tax imposes a 10 percent surcharge on the use of ultraviolet indoor tanning beds.

Supporters -- including the Obama administration, congressional Democrats and dermatologists -- have argued that the tax will raise an estimated $2.7 billion toward the cost of expanding health coverage to the uninsured, while discouraging a practice that increases the risk of skin cancer by as much as threefold in frequent users, according to scientific research.


Explain this to me, please: if you raise the cost (tax) of something, it reduces demand, right? And according to the article, one of the justifications for the new "tan-tax" is to discourage the practice. So if people stop tanning, how, exactly, is that supposed to raise $2.7 billion to fund Obamacare?

These clowns never cease to amaze me. I'm not an economist, but even I can see the gaping holes in this plan. When the money fails to come in, they're going to have to "find funding elsewhere," meaning either raising more taxes or, more probably, placing a fee on something like internet usage (something that almost everyone uses and, honestly, would be really, really hard to live without). It's inescapable.

Actually, that's not entirely true. There's one way out: vote out the Democrats in November. All of them.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Memo to Everyone Who Has a Blog

People hate it when they click on your blog and are sitting there reading and suddenly, out of nowhere, music starts playing. Even if it's awesome music or completely beautiful music or music everyone likes. And ten times out of ten the music is turned up all the way on the site, so it comes through blaring unexpectedly.

And then there's the mad scramble to find where the sound is coming from to turn it off. And most times, the music is located in a tiny little plugin on the very bottom or way down on the side of the page. Meanwhile, everyone in my department or my house, wherever I happen to be clicking to your blog from, is getting really annoyed - but not as annoyed as I am - that I have this damn music playing at full volume.

I know you think it's cute and that it adds personality to your site, but please take the damn music or video off your site that plays automatically. At the very least, make it so that people have to make the decision to turn it on. But please don't shove it down our throats while we're trying to read about your kids or your dog or your weekend at the lake.

Oh, and your blog background is annoying, too.

Designers Have a Sick Sense of Humor

Shannon (the secretary) has lost her cat and has asked David (the graphic designer) to help with a lost poster. This is their email correspondence...


Hi
I opened the screen door yesterday and my cat got out and has been missing since then so I was wondering if you are not to busy you could make a poster for me. It has to be A4 and I will photocopy it and put it around my suburb this afternoon.



This is the only photo of her I have she answers to the name Missy and is black and white and about 8 months old. missing on Harper street and my phone number.
Thanks Shan.


____________________________________________________

From:
David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.26am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,

That is shocking news. Luckily I was sitting down when I read your email and not half way up a ladder or tree. How are you holding up? I am surprised you managed to attend work at all what with thinking about Missy out there cold, frightened and alone... possibly lying on the side of the road, her back legs squashed by a vehicle, calling out "Shannon, where are you?"
Although I have two clients expecting completed work this afternoon, I will, of course, drop everything and do whatever it takes to facilitate the speedy return of Missy.

Regards, David.




____________________________________________________

From:
Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.37am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Poster

yeah ok thanks. I know you dont like cats but I am really worried about mine. I have to leave at 1pm today.




____________________________________________________

From:
David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.17am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,

I never said I don't like cats. Once, having been invited to a party, I went clothes shopping beforehand and bought a pair of expensive G-Star boots. They were two sizes too small but I wanted them so badly I figured I could just wear them without socks and cut my toenails very short. As the party was only a few blocks from my place, I decided to walk. After the first block, I lost all feeling in my feet. Arriving at the party, I stumbled into a guy named Steven, spilling Malibu & coke onto his white Wham 'Choose Life' t-shirt, and he punched me. An hour or so after the incident, Steven sat down in a chair already occupied by a cat. The surprised cat clawed and snarled causing Steven to leap out of the chair, slip on a rug and strike his forehead onto the corner of a speaker; resulting in a two inch open gash. In its shock, the cat also defecated, leaving Steven with a foul stain down the back of his beige cargo pants. I liked that cat.

Attached poster as requested.

Regards, David.






____________________________________________________

From:
Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.24am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

yeah thats not what I was looking for at all. it looks like a movie and how come the photo of Missy is so small?




____________________________________________________

From:
David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.28am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,

It's a design thing. The cat is lost in the negative space.
Regards, David.




____________________________________________________

From:
Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.33am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Thats just stupid. Can you do it properly please? I am extremely emotional over this and was up all night in tears. you seem to think it is funny. Can you make the photo bigger please and fix the text and do it in colour please. Thanks.




____________________________________________________
From:
David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.46am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,

Having worked with designers for a few years now, I would have assumed you understood, despite our vague suggestions otherwise, we do not welcome constructive criticism. I don't come downstairs and tell you how to send text messages, log onto Facebook and look out of the window. I am willing to overlook this faux pas due to you no doubt being preoccupied with thoughts of Missy attempting to make her way home across busy intersections or being trapped in a drain as it slowly fills with water. I spent three days down a well once but that was just for fun.

I have amended and attached the poster as per your instructions.
Regards, David.






____________________________________________________

From:
Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.59am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

This is worse than the other one. can you make it so it shows the whole photo of Missy and delete the stupid text that says missing missy off it? I just want it to say Lost.





____________________________________________________

From:
David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.14am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster







____________________________________________________

From:
Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.21am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

yeah can you do the poster or not? I just want a photo and the word lost and the telephone number and when and where she was lost and her name. Not like a movie poster or anything stupid. I have to leave early today. If it was your cat I would help you. Thanks.





____________________________________________________

From:
David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.32am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Awww

Dear Shannon,

I don't have a cat. I once agreed to look after a friend's cat for a week but after he dropped it off at my apartment and explained the concept of kitty litter, I kept the cat in a closed cardboard box in the shed and forgot about it. If I wanted to feed something and clean faeces, I wouldn't have put my mother in that home after her stroke. A week later, when my friend came to collect his cat, I pretended that I was not home and mailed the box to him. Apparently I failed to put enough stamps on the package and he had to collect it from the post office and pay eighteen dollars. He still goes on about that sometimes, people need to learn to let go.
I have attached the amended version of your poster as per your detailed instructions.

Regards, David.







____________________________________________________
From:
Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.47am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Awww

Thats not my cat. where did you get that picture from? That cat is orange. I gave you a photo of my cat.





____________________________________________________

From:
David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.58am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Awww

I know, but that one is cute. As Missy has quite possibly met any one of several violent ends, it is possible you might get a better cat out of this. If anybody calls and says "I haven't seen your orange cat but I did find a black and white one with its hind legs run over by a car, do you want it?" you can politely decline and save yourself a costly veterinarian bill.

I knew someone who had a basset hound that had its hind legs removed after an accident and it had to walk around with one of those little buggies with wheels. If it had been my dog I would have asked for all its legs to be removed and replaced with wheels and had a remote control installed. I could charge neighbourhood kids for rides and enter it in races. If I did the same with a horse I could drive it to work. I would call it Steven.
Regards, David.





____________________________________________________

From:
Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.07pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Please just use the photo I gave you.






____________________________________________________

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.22pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww





____________________________________________________
From:
Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.34pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

I didnt say there was a reward. I dont have $2000 dollars. What did you even put that there for? Apart from that it is perfect can you please remove the reward bit. Thanks Shan.




____________________________________________________

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.42pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww






____________________________________________________

From:
Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.51pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Can you just please take the reward bit off altogether? I have to leave in ten minutes and I still have to make photocopies of it.




____________________________________________________
From:
David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.56pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww






____________________________________________________

From:
Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 1.03pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Fine. That will have to do.





Huge thanks to Flinta for passing this on...

Smell Like Bruce

From BoingBoing:



Bruce Willis cologne? It's true. Now you can smell just like Bruce Willis (hopefully not the sweaty Bruce in the Die Hard movies, though).

I wonder who thought this would be a good idea. And now? Not ten or fifteen years ago when (let's be honest) he was at his prime?

I love one of the comments: "I'll keep my eye on Big Lots in the next few months and pick this up cheap."

Exactly.

Big thanks to Matt.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Muslims .... In ..... Space.... Space ..... Space....

From Fox News:

NASA Administrator Charles Bolden said in a recent interview that his "foremost" mission as the head of America's space exploration agency is to improve relations with the Muslim world.

Though international diplomacy would seem well outside NASA's orbit, Bolden said in an interview with Al Jazeera that strengthening those ties was among the top tasks President Obama assigned him. He said better interaction with the Muslim world would ultimately advance space travel.

"When I became the NASA administrator -- or before I became the NASA administrator -- he charged me with three things. One was he wanted me to help re-inspire children to want to get into science and math, he wanted me to expand our international relationships, and third, and perhaps foremost, he wanted me to find a way to reach out to the Muslim world and engage much more with dominantly Muslim nations to help them feel good about their historic contribution to science ... and math and engineering," Bolden said in the interview.


Makes complete sense, right? Better interaction with the Muslim world will, of course, advance space travel. I mean, MIddle Eastern countries are known for their space programs, and we have so much to learn before we can finally join the space race. Oh, wait. Strike that. Switch it around.

It's pretty obvious that Obama's directive to Bolden is meant to further their technology and bring them into the "space club." What's in it for us? That's not clear, but my guess is absolutely nothing.

But my main gripe is... why single out the Muslim world? Why not aid the Hispanic world or the Asian world or the Jewish world or the Buddhist world? This seems like a blatantly cherry-picked target. And for Obama to tell Bolden that it was his prime directive? It not only smacks of favoritism, but also of vested interest. This from a president who keeps claiming that he isn't Muslim.

It's not that I have a problem with Muslims (my father and half my family is) per se, but it's the targeting I have a problem with. This is also the first time I can recall the United States showing favoritism to a specific religion. In the past, we've helped countries and regions, such as England or Europe. I find it wholly inappropriate for the United States to favor one religion over another around the world. Where are is "separation of Church and State" crowd now?

And one other thing that grated on me from this article...

"The NASA administrator was in the Middle East last month marking the one-year anniversary since Obama delivered an address to Muslim nations in Cairo."


He was overseas to commemorate the one year anniversary of an Obama speech? Are you freaking kidding me? What in the world is the director of NASA doing commemorating a speech outside of the United States? This is after our space program was cut earlier in the year due to funding issues. Hey, Bolden - stay here in the U.S. and apply the tens of thousands of dollars you just spent to go to the Middle East to commemorate a speech - one that was offensive to many Americans, at that - and apply that money toward R&D on new rockets.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Wrong. Just wrong.

Photoshop (badly) much?

My, my. That's some crazy blue water.

Friday, July 2, 2010

All Wrong

I haven't experienced (or even been able to duplicate) the "grip of death" issue that the media seems to be fixating on regarding the iPhone 4. But people nonetheless have been wailing and gnashing their teeth over it.

From Apple:
We have discovered the cause of this dramatic drop in bars, and it is both simple and surprising.

Upon investigation, we were stunned to find that the formula we use to calculate how many bars of signal strength to display is totally wrong. Our formula, in many instances, mistakenly displays 2 more bars than it should for a given signal strength. For example, we sometimes display 4 bars when we should be displaying as few as 2 bars. Users observing a drop of several bars when they grip their iPhone in a certain way are most likely in an area with very weak signal strength, but they don’t know it because we are erroneously displaying 4 or 5 bars. Their big drop in bars is because their high bars were never real in the first place.


That means that testing of the iPhone 4's built-in antennae is completely unreliable. If prototype units were tested using the faulty algorithm, then we have no idea - to this day - if a phone which has its antenna as part of the phone's design gets any better or worse reception than other phones. When Apple engineers were walking around looking at cell reception on the phone, the information they were looking at was completely useless.

Shocking (and somewhat disheartening) admission from Apple.

Hot Tub Time Machine


On a whim, Kristi and I rented Hot Tub Time Machine last night. She loves John Cusack and I love stupid movies, so we thought it would be perfect. Just based on the title and the trailer, our expectations weren't very high. It looks like one of those movies where all the funny parts are in the trailer. But we were pleasantly surprised. It was actually a pretty good movie.

It had a lot of laugh-out-loud moments and a lot of great throw away lines and subtle jokes. I suspect that watching it again would be just as entertaining. It's one of those movies where you just don't catch everything the first time.

But the best part is that Hot Tub Time Machine doesn't take itself seriously at all. It knows its premise is stupid and its characters are wonderfully flawed.

It is IN NO WAY safe for kids to watch. Lots of language, drug references, sex and nudity. I can't really say that it's good clean fun. But it's a lot of fun. If The Wedding Singer, Back to the Future and Superbad had a baby, this would be it. And its soundtrack is awesome, too, with '80s tracks all over the board from heavy metal to pop (or pretty much the kinds of music you would have heard mashed together on the same radio station back in the '80s.)

It's got the Destructo seal of approval©. I highly recommend it.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Another One Bites The Dust

From AdAge:

In what may be one of the fastest launch-to-failure paths ever taken by a major marketer, Microsoft's Kin, the company's first phone product, is being discontinued just six weeks after its May 13 launch.

The Kin One was priced at $49.99 while the Kin Two was a full $99.99 after their respective $100 rebates, coupled with a mandatory $30 monthly service fee that many consumers resisted. MarketWatch first reported that Microsoft only sold 500 phones during Kin's first six weeks, a figure that Microsoft representatives would not confirm or deny. Even a last-minute price slash on June 24, knocking $20 off the Kin One and $50 off Kin Two, appeared to be too little too late.

The Kin's failure echoes Microsoft's other expensive grab for Apple's share -- the Zune, which in 2006 tried to steal a hefty portion of the iPod's overwhelming command of the MP3 market. After nearly $30 million in measured media during its first nine months, the music player only mustered a 2.2% share of the MP3 market, according to NPD.

Microsoft's Windows mobile operating system has been steadily losing share and in first quarter powered only 6.8% of smartphones sold, according to Gartner, behind Symbian, Research in Motion, Apple and Android. That's down from 10.2% for the year-earlier quarter.

Microsoft's Windows 7 phone is expected to launch in the fourth quarter of this year.


Is it just me, or does the word "thud" seem to describe everything in the post-Bill Gates era at Microsoft?