Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Here comes the iPod killer, again.... zzzzZzzZzZzzzZ ...


Oh, my Gawd. WHY are we still talking about the Zune and using "iPod Killer" in the same sentence instead of phrases like "alsoran" or "only losers have them" or "landfill fodder" or "piece of shit that has failed in the open market?"

Microsoft today announced the (kazoo fanfare here) ... Zune HD! It's the iPod Killer. Seriously. No - we mean it this time. ZzzzzZZzzZZzZzZ....

It has a touch interface. Like the iPod. It has HD output and a wide screen. Like the iPod. Oh, and it has a web browser, also for when you're in range of a wifi network. Just. Like. The. iPhone. BUT WAIT! There's more! It ALSO has an HD radio in it and has XBox integration. ZzzzZzzZzzzZzzzz...

Pricing and specs haven't been announced yet, but if history is a guide, then it will be specced to match the iPod and priced about the same, too. So basically you can get a device that screams to your friends "I'M LAME" for the same price you could get a genuine iPod, which - and let's face it - will make your skin beautiful, make your hair shiny, your teeth whiter and will make you instantly more attractive to the point that you'll have to hide in a cave to rest from getting laid so much just because of your sheer awesomeness. Maybe a step too far, but you get it. For the same money you get The Real Thing®. Not Big K cola.

But I guess clueless parents have to have SOME way to disappoint their kids on Christmas morning SOMEHOW...

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